No, I didn’t Forget

nicole-holofcener-quote-believe-me-i-didnt-forget

Yes I know that this past Sunday was September 11th and yes I know I did not write a post about September 11th. For those of you who may not live in the United States and may not know the significance of September 11th in our country it was that horrible day in 2001 when the muslim terrorists attacked my great country and killed over three thousand people. 

No, I didn’t forget about it. How could anyone who lived through it forget it? I lived only twenty minutes outside New York City on the Jersey side at the time, I remember watching the flames burn and the smoke billow for weeks into the air from my living room window. I remember not being able to open the windows because of the stench coming from the city. I remember watching and seeing the small children who went to school with my nephews and my niece whose parents were murdered that day walk around in utter shock. I remember watching people jump out the windows of the Twin Towers to their deaths. I remember watching people waking aimlessly like zombies the city streets for even a thread of information about loved ones. I remember trying to get through on cell phones to loved ones and friends unaccounted for. 

I remember for the next few years ducking my head every time a plane flew over my house as we lived in a flight path, the same flight path that the terrorists took that fateful day. I remember the fear that crept in no matter how much you tried not to let it. I remember the funerals, the masses, the memorials, the tears, the pain. I remember the souls who perished that day…I do not like remembering all of these things. I do not like that, when I remember I can literally still smell the stench that was in the air for over two weeks. 

It is not that I don’t care. It is that I care too much and it is that, fifteen years later, I can still remember, feel and smell as if it were yesterday.

So yes, I remember. 

 And no, I did not forget.. 

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